stop hiding behind the words

It’s been bubbling. Building slowly, and now it is rushing forth, bursting at the dams of your heart and mind. It’s the words that have been clawing at your fingers, the words that you have been hiding from, words that are struggling to get out. I’m here to tell you stop hiding from the words. The words you are hiding from hold the power to heal you and help you make meaning from your  experiences. Journaling tells us things about ourselves. And that can be scary, because sometimes we are not ready to confront the things that journaling can reveal about us. As a journal coach, when I work with women who’ve been through the aches and pains of life, many of them start opening up, and then they freeze up. Often they would say I don’t want to go there, meaning they don’t want to explore the story that’s…

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Dear men

I was inspired to write this post after personal experiences and those of a few close friends of mine. We have all been abused, two of us are divorced, one on her way out of a deeply abusive marriage. All of us still believe that there are good men out there. Men who are willing to put in the work to love and understand what it takes to engage with and love a woman who has been used and abused. So men, listen up, from our heart to yours. Notice I said men, right? Boys need not apply. Dear Men, Did you know that inside a hurt and abused woman is quite often, a frightened girl? She is hopeful that something better is around the corner, but her optimism is tainted by fear. In most instances, she’s not guided by fear but fear is there. And it makes her more watchful,…

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Scars of Our Mothers’ Dreams Recap

To the 35 people who turned out to last evening’s Cocktails & Conversations, thank you so much. We laughed, we cried, we showed empathy and we engaged in meaningful, and hopefully transformative conversation. Meschida Philip and I did a vid post for those of you who wanted to come but could not, and I’ll be posting some pics to the Facebook page tomorrow.   A million thanks to Sue Brathwaite for allowing us to use her space, The Connection, again and thank you to Melisa Nicholas, the best mixologist in the game for bringing us more tasty cocktails. Thank you also to Eastern Caribbean Rum Co. for sponsoring the cocktail portion of the event and of course, much love to Meschida for debuting her film with the FemmePowered/Cocktails & Conversation audience. Visit Meschida’s website and the documentary’s Facebook page to connect with her and follow her work.  Also stop by…

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To help or to hurt. You decide.

He had not been looking well lately and I feared that his addiction had taken hold of him again. He later admitted so. Some years he had no deep craving or desire. Other years were a constant struggle. Then there were the times he relapsed. One thing was constant – for 30 years drug addiction plagued and haunted him.   I wondered what his life would have looked like had he not touched the white powder and I wondered if there was a way that he could once and for all become clean and remain so. I guess I would never know. Maybe he too, would never know. But what I did know is that I could show him kindness, charity and the grace we all need to pull us through tough days.   Drug addiction, I am learning, is a disease. It needs treating like all other ailments.We don’t look down…

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Wine and Journals – An Aye Gyal Event

This event will be hosted in Trinidad on  29 April, 2017 – 3-6 pm Unwined Wine Bar, 80 Eastern Main Road and Henry Street Arouca, Trinidad. I love stories and recognize their importance. I find solace, comfort and hope in them. I believe that all our stories matter and they are worth sharing. We do ourselves a great injustice when we don’t see the significance of our stories. The failure to see their importance means that they aren’t shared, they aren’t honored, and  we compare our stories with those of others. We let another person’s story stifle us from sharing ours because we feel that theirs is more powerful, significant, more important than ours. Your story matters and there is no competition in our collective stories. My story of abuse and abandonment is no more significant than the story of the woman who struggles with weight issues or that of the woman who secretly cuts herself. Our…

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